What don't women tell about pregnancy?

When I became pregnant I felt betrayed by the women. I felt like the whole world has been lying to me about what it's like to be pregnant. Every day I can see on TV or read on the internet about the magical pregnancy time in woman's life. I see pictures of  glowing pregnant women in mass media every day. And it seems that all the negatives during pregnancy are just small inconveniences. I have sincerely believed in this fairy tale. And when I became pregnant reality hit me hard. 

Now I understand that pregnancy can bring ambivalent feelings. It can be very exhausting both mentally and physically. It can be very difficult and not so joyful. But women do not talk about it. It is completely normal if you sometimes wish you were not pregnant. It is absolutely normal to grieve that the life you have lived is over forever. It is normal to miss times when you were not pregnant. Unfortunately anyone has told me that. So when I started having doubts I felt alone. I felt like I was the only one in the world with those scaring feelings. I blamed myself I was not happy enough. I felt weak because I was not heroic enough when dealing with vomiting and other unpleasant pregnancy symptoms.

But now I understand that most women have some kind of struggles during pregnancies. They mostly suffer in silence. Even my friends who have babies started openly talking to me about their struggles during pregnancy only when I told them about my challenges. 

So do not believe in fairy tales! Life is not just black or white. It is mainly grey...